mother of dan

Wilson has become one of my favorite of the Malawian staff here, as driver, he has been the one through the summer who has awakened many a smile on my face. Wilson has brought me to and from the village I lived in, he has been the one to carry in water or food for us…thus everyone loves Wilson.

So as we set out to Lake Malawi today for a staff appreciation event, Wilson makes sure I am sitting next to his wife and kids. “Abanda, you are about to meet my better half”, he tells me, as we drive up to his hut in the village. Eight people live in the little hut that I stare at, Wilson has been married 22 years and they have six kids. I look over at Jody reading a Francine River’s Christian romance novel and I wonder if I have any concept of true romance.

As Wilson’s son, Esau naps on my lap drooling down my arm, I study Wilson and his wife Pauline as they interact. She laughs at him quite often as Wilson is a character to say the least. I notice the name he calls her is different than her name – I still fighting my romantic make-up assume it is a pet name they call each other. By the time the picnic rolls around I ask Wilson what is the translation for the name he calls his wife. They look at each other fondly, “ I call her mother of Dan and she calls me father of Dan.” My little romantic notions are squashed. “Why?” I ask in Chichewa. He explains and what I got from it was that it was their first creation of life together.

It wasn’t a “he’s your son” comment, it was a beautiful mystery that somehow two people could offer their very selves in human form. Of course this beautiful epiphany was told over Wilson serving his wife cabbage and her breast feeding their 10 month old. It was a realistic picture, yes we have six kids and most days we are running with our heads cut off taking care of them, but we also honor the beauty and wonder of creation.

Later that night, Jody and I talked about her romance novel and the future husbands we dream about, but more intrigued by all of that we were speechless to think of the power of love shared that very night in a mud hut between a man and a woman and their six children.