Tuesday, October 26, 2004

Borrow Mine

I haven't figured out how often to write on this thing, how much I should say, or even what is understandable to everyone....my life today is really good. I began the morning early, and I laughed when I saw my hair in the mirror - always meaning it is going to be a good day! I ran 4.5 miles yesterday with my friend Cristina (she has told me that next week we are running 6 miles...stay tuned to see if that actually happens!), and I am beginning to feel each day like I just might like myself alot. It is amazing that the only person we get to spend our entire lives with is God and ourselves. God is crazy cool but I'm still figuring out if I am excited about spending my lifetime with Christy. (a very important question to answer!)

So in all the pain and changes within my heart, I feel as if my passion for life has been lost, yet recently I get glimpses of it in people. Whether it is a hope that Autumn has in me, a letter that Beth sends me, a hilarious voicemail from Kinsey - it is in my friends that I find that I can borrow their hope when I can't seem to find my own. Maybe I am just realizing that life may be all about living fully and when you can't you must borrow if from someone who loves you.

I already have accomplished the greatest day I could ever expect. I did something this morning for a friend, and I know that she knows that I love her....and somehow I don't need anything else to complete my day - it is an amazing thing to give someone the gift of love. Sometimes I just babble when I start talking about this stuff, but I know the most powerful gift you can give someone at any moment is to show them they are unique, of worth and lovable. May we all live today loving.

Faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love. 1Cor. 13:13

Friday, October 22, 2004

To be vulnerable or not to be...

This week has been a whirlwind, between birthdays, work, training (because I am training for a half marathon!) and meeting with people - I feel like my heart and my feelings are drowning in what I have deemed the pursuit of life. Full week and weekend. I am getting certified to teach spinning classes (cycling) so that should be an exciting adventure. I have tons of thoughts on Lamentations 3 but I will save it for another day....when I have more time.


Who has the right to comment on one's dreams?
While I tiptoe across your beating heart,
It is in these black and white screens I find you lost,
And fear that you might never see,
the hope which lives in each of the scenes.
-CAV

Monday, October 18, 2004

my heart...online?

so this is my first blog, i didn't really think I would want to do this but it will make it easier for me to let those near and far know where I am, in my heart that is! or physically...I am in Orlando, FL which I read yesterday is called the City of Dreams...funny, definitely not the title I would have given it. To catch those up on my life who I haven't been in touch with...I am on the up of a long year and a half hike here in Florida. God and I have walked through some hard places, and I feel I have scratched the surface of respecting and even embracing pain.

I heard this line in a teaching and it still resonates with me...."God would not take pain away from us, for it is too great of a gift."


More to come....