Tuesday, October 04, 2005
Where are you?
I hung up the phone as I reached the doorway to class just a minute late. As I found my seat in the classroom I remember thinking life is getting a little too methodical, I want to make out with someone. You might find that odd but there are days, which I call make out days that I would just about mug down with anyone....too honest? well there it is. I mean, I never act on it. To explain this shows how I was relating to the Lord, I mean, in our relationship it has been alot of hardship and loyalty lately. Not much room for passion, a long time since we have had a "make out session". I mean this in the most non-sexual way, I miss the passion. Anyway, class begins and through the next 2 classes I feel the longing grow, and the Lord even asking me if I could meet Him in the woods behind school this afternoon. In our last class, we were talking about Gen. 3 and how God called out to Adam and Eve....where are you? we discussed what the meant. so strongly I felt the Lord say I was calling to them because I am lost without them, they are a part of Me. Christy, you are a part of Me...there is a loss when I am without you. I found myself racing to the back to the campus to find a favorite little brook that I love to sit by and there I told the Lord that I feared He could not quench my needs, my wants, my passion. It began to lightning and thunder loudly, and the rain came. I let them pour down on me, I let His answer to my desire reach deep into the crevices of my doubts.
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4 comments:
Oh I love the poetry of your last line... to let His answer rain down into the crevices of your doubt... beautiful, Girl!
I was so happy to have talked w/ you last night. I felt so loved w/ phone calls from you and Autie. It's been a long time since I've felt loved that way.
I wanted to tell you (but didn't get the chance) that I feel totally in the same boat with you. You call them "make out" days, I call them "hormonal days."-- and i don't mean menopause... more like men make me pause. HAHAHA!! {Sigh}, I know we should be content and celebrate singleness and all that stuff I tell my girls but it's okay to feel things. Like a wise woman said to me, "You can't stop a bird from flying over your head but you can stop it from making a nest in your hair." We can't help feeling like you could just grab the next cute guy and mug down (to mug in any other context is to steal, but with Aggies, it is kissing-- so crazy to hear that verb-age again), but we can choose not stew on those thoughts and actually do it. I love you so much, Cre Babe. You know I'm totally serious that if we're single in the long-run, let's be roommates forever (God willing). In the meantime, you say the word, and Autumn and I WILL fast and pray for your hubbie. LOVE YOU!
uhhh...thanks for volunteering me to fast, tran. geez...i guess i will if you need me to when you find that right someone, cre. or are we fasting that someone comes along? because, honestly, i think just to grab someone and mug down is a great option during this waiting stage. :)
LOVE YOU!
Hey girls I totally identify! Hi Autumn and Tran if you look at this again! Christy thanks for sharing that in the car on our drive. It blessed me! I thought I would just post a comment about that. I LOVE that he satisfies our every desire! We'll look back and laugh one day! Love you!
Sarah Brown
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